Republicans: Ivy league-educated wealthy men who supposedly represent the interests of a large number of under-educated poor rednecks. Actually represent the interests of the corporations that own them. Have claimed proprietary ownership of the words "patriot," "freedom," and "freedom fries."
Socialists: When not using martial law to command fearful obedience from the population, are often well-intentioned, but do not understand the effects of "fairness" on economic activity. If day-care providers and early elementary educators ran the government, socialism would be the result.
Libertarians: Can be religious zealots, staunch atheists, or anywhere in between. Would often be willing to go to jail rather than pay taxes. Many are skilled "survivalists," able to live in wooded areas without running water or electricity for months or years at a time. Typically owns guns. Lots of guns.